Monday, December 6, 2010

DONE BY CHRISTMAS

The last 6 or 7 weeks have been difficult but things are definitely looking up. The wounds from the previous two surgeries are starting to heal up nicely. The former melanoma sight is actually starting to look like skin. Although it still probably has a few weeks to heal, it actually looks like it may look like a leg again at some point. I have been up and walking for a little over a week now, slowly improving daily. Today was the first day I was able to exercise since the day of the first surgery, October 18. Long time for me!

The plan was to come back to Charlotte and finish up what was hopefully the last month of treatments. The melanoma was successfully removed, but there was concern about the cancer possibly spreading from the surgery, especially since the immune system can be weakened during surgery and from time spent in the hospital. I started back at Dr. Buttar's office last Tuesday. I was feeling very run down this time last week. I had been stuck on bed rest for almost 6 weeks, 2 surgeries did a number on me as well as being stuck on painkillers I wanted no part of for 2 or 3 weeks. After Tuesday at Buttar's I felt much better. The IV treatments did wonders for me. I was surprised at how quickly my energy levels came back. Unbelievable stuff! I was given the first of the final AARSOTA shot last Tuesday. The doctor and I talked about this previously and he decided it was best to go ahead with the round of shots although I thought they were unnecessary( probably because I was feeling so run down, a large needle in the ass and possible reaction were not all that appealing at the time). His rational was that if things had spread, they would be relatively small and weak and now would be the time to turn up the immune system on high alert and get rid of it once and for all. He said that if I had no reaction to the AARSOTA shot that meant there was nothing for the immune system to fight, meaning that there is not a hint of cancer left in the my body.

I had no reaction whatsoever! Great news!! I knew in my heart that after the surgery was performed that any trace of cancer was gone, although it was nice to have it confirmed by the doctor!

The plan is to go two days per week for the next three weeks to finish up the last 3 AARSOTA shots then be done. Possibly a maintenance program every two weeks to once every month for a little while to keep the body in good working order. By Christmas I should be done with all of this once and for all!!!!!!

A little side not to this story. I was at home last weekend packing up to come down to Charlotte to start treatment again. Nurse Johnna came up to drive me back to Charlotte and was staying the weekend. She was looking through the book shelves in my dad's living room and pulled the book ANATOMY OF THE SPIRIT the Seven Stages of Power and Healing by Caroline Miss from the shelf. Johnna commented what a great book it was and asked me dad whose it was. He told us that it was my mothers book. I swear I have looked through this bookshelf literally hundreds of times and never saw this book. These particular shelves are not that big. This is a book I would have remembered seeing. At the time it was no big deal, but I decided to take it back to Charlotte and read it while at Dr. Buttar's office. I get back to Buttar's and started reading it. (It is a fantastic book and I would recommend anyone reading it, especially if faced with some type of illness.)

I am reading the book on Tuesday and I notice that there are scribbled lines throughout the book. I paged through the book and noticed them throughout, often times at parts that seemed relevant to what I was going through at the moment. I wasn't sure where these lines had come from. It looked like a young child or someone very drunk was doing the underlining. It struck my as very strange, but I forgot about it until the next day when I was back reading at Buttar's office. I was getting the AARSOTA shot that day and was a bit nervous. This was really a make or break day for me. If I had no reaction to the shot, I was done, if there were some sort of reaction I may have to continue treatments. It was a bit of a stressful day for me. I began reading again and it dawned on me where the scribbles had come from. My mother had been reading this book some 10-12 years ago while she was going through cancer treatments as well. (For those of you who don't know the story of my mother, the lines were scribbled because she had brain surgery and lost some of the function of her writing hand. She had trouble writing amongst other things, but she never gave up on anything!) It hit me like a ton of bricks, she was reading the very same material I was at that critical moment in my life more than a decade ago and the message in the book could not have been more fitting. After the initial shock and sadness thinking about her not being around, I felt an overwhelming sense of calm I have never felt in my life. I knew at that moment, that the cancer was gone for good. Before she died she told all of us she would be with us always, I could not think of a moment I needed her more and she responded. Truly amazing!!!!! The events that lead me to seek out a better way than the outdated, barbaric cancer treatment mostly available today seem like a bizarre series of very random events, although I know better. Things really do happen for a reason!!!!!!

These are two of the sentences she had underlined more than a decade ago.

" Release the need to know why things happen as they do, and to trust that whatever the reason is, it is a part of a grander spiritual design."

"Let me know what I am able to know and trust that behind all events, no matter how painful, there is a reason from which all good can come"
This may seem like a coincidence to some, a miracle to others. The piece of mind and the connection I felt to my mother at that point was truly amazing. I felt she was sitting next to me letting me know life is just beginning!